|What she needs to remember
||What she can do
|Don't ask him too many questions when he is upset or he will feel
you are trying to change him
||Ignore that he is upset unless he wants to talk to you about it.
Show some initial concerns but not too much as an invitation to talk
|Give up trying to improve him in any way. He needs your love, not
rejection, to grow
||Trust him to grow on his own, honestly share feelings but without
the demand that he change
|When you offer unsolicited advice he may feel mistrusted, controlled
||Practise patience and trust that he will learn on his own what he
needs to learn. Wait until he asks for your advice.
|When a man becomes stufbborn and resists change he is not feeling
loved. He is afraid to admit his mistakes for fear of not being loved.
||Practise showing him that he doesn't have to be perfect to deserve
your love. Practise forgiveness.
|If you make sacrifices hoping he will do the same for you then he
will feel pressured to change.
||Practise doing things for yourself and not depending on him to make
|You can share negative feelings without trying to change him. When
he feels accepted it is easier for him to listen.
||When sharing feelings, let him know that you are not trying to tell
him what to do but that you want him to take your feelings into consideration
|If you give him directions and make decisions for him he will feel
corrected and controlled
||Relax and surrender. Practise accepting imperfection. Make his feelings
more important than perfection and don't lecture or correct him